Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Fountain Pens, Seriously?

For a number  of years now, I've seen people pull fountain pens out of their pockets whenever a signature is called for.  I've always assumed they were pretentious posers and probably, even worse, lawyers.

I recently discovered the Pilot Varsity, a disposable fountain pen, and decided to try it out to see what the big deal was.  I was not impressed.  It felt like a gel pen when writing and it shared the major shortcoming of gel pens.  If the paper is curling and the tip makes any contact, ink flows.  Worse, I was playing with the cat, whipping the pen back and forth for him to bat at it and and it flung ink out.  I can just see these on the playground.  Kids would be having ink fights.

It turns out that the Bic Crystal, a 60 year old design, is still the most practical pen around.  The hexagonal body prevents it from rolling too far.  The transparent body lets you know when you should think about a replacement.  It won't leak in your pocket, even if you loose the cap.  It's cheap.  It's sturdy, you can put it in your back pocket and sit on it with out breaking it.  I even found one under the carpet of my car several years after I bought it and after some coaxing it still wrote.  Finally the ink is thick enough and the point sturdy enough that it requires some serious pressure to write with it.

I understand that artists and calligraphers might have uses for fountain pens, but not the rest of us.

When the zombies come, all the diaries will be written with Bic Crystals or pencils.

So, yes, fountain pens are for pretentious posers.