Hey! Adobe! My keyboard has a pause key.

And I'll bet yours does too.  Look at it.  Every PC keyboard has a 'pause' key and since they are now just PCs running a Unix clone with a bunch of proprietary crap on top, so do Macs. 

So, Adobe programmers, since you make video playing software, don't you think that maybe, you should have put the said key to use.  You'd think that people might want to occasionally pause a video they are watching.  You'd think that it would be convenient to do so by simply pressing a key labeled as such and that pretty much goes unused by other programs.  But NoooOOOoooo!  You had to leave it to us to grope for the mouse (or whatever), jiggle it to find the cursor, navigate it to the right place, and then click on the little picture of a stereo control.  You're now on the List.

Forms Form Factors.

I live in California.  There are three documents you need to have on you when pulled over by a cop, license, proof of insurance, and the registration of the car.  Like most people I keep them in my wallet.  And that sucks.

It's bad enough that they aren't the same size.  Their dimensions aren't even integer multiples of each other.  My drivers license is the same size as a credit card.  That has been the case with every other one I've seen, whatever the state, whatever the country.  And, for some reason, the dimensions are odd in both Imperial and Metric (3 3/8", 86mm X 2 1/8", 54mm).  Why couldn't they have made it 3" X 2" or 85mm X 35mm?  You could fit all the information in there.  But I digress.

Let's just call the current dimensions W and H.  My proof of insurance is 1.21W X 2.22H, with plenty of white space (it is actually pink paper but pink space is a weird term.).  It could easily be made W X 2H with all the room needed for the required information.  My registration is even worse at  2.49W X 2.57H.  With even more white space.  There is a 6" bar code along the top.  I've never seen it scanned.  My reader couldn't, probably because it's been damaged from being folded up to fit it in my wallet, which is the case with almost everybody's.  The back has a bunch of address and phone numbers that everyone would go to the internet to get before looking at their registration.  So, using the back and skipping the unreadable bar code, all the information could put on a W X 2H form as well.

But NoooOOOoooOOOOoo.  For some reason the DMV and Insurance companies just pulled some random sizes out of their asses.

For this reason the employees who made those decisions and their bosses, all the way up, are on The List.

Another Rant about Packaging.

Why is peanut butter still sold in tall skinny jars?  When you get to the bottom, no standard butter knives are long enough.  To get the last of it you have to either find something long enough to reach the bottom or just get your hands covered with the stuff.  Neither is acceptable with the options we have today.

Jelly manufacturers have offered squeeze bottles for years now.  I've seen mustard in tooth paste type tubes.  The only places you can find ketchup in glass bottles is in restaurants, and the only reason I can imagine they do this is so people will give up before getting all they want out of those bottles.  For fucks sake, they've invented spray on cheese.  What all this shows is that the food industry isn't afraid of changing their packaging.

Why is peanut butter mired in the old "jar" paradigm when so many other options exist for packaging goopy substances.

It could be packaged the same plastic tubes that caulk comes in.  Of course the shortcoming of this is that you couldn't really use a standard caulking gun in the kitchen.  You'd need something plastic without a lot of crevices, but that could be made or perhaps somehow integrated with the tube containing the peanut butter. 

It could be sold in plastic bags similar to those ones that pastry chefs use for frosting but with a re-closeable fitting.  This would have the advantage of getting smaller as you consume the peanut butter because storing containers mostly of air sucks.

Then there is the good old tooth paste tube for smaller amounts.  This would be perfect for lunch boxes.

Features for a communter bike.

I recently had my bike stolen.  That sucks, but it was my own damn fault for not locking it properly.  Nevertheless I had to buy a new one.

I only use my bike to get around town.  My last one was what the bike marketing people called a "hybrid", which, as near as I can tell means "cheap mountain bike".  It wasn't a good commuter.  Being bent over made it impossible to adequately check behind for traffic, I had to get off the seat at each light, and the bar gave my balls an uncomfortable squeezing, it looked too high-tech, attracting thieves and it had too many gears.

From this experience I came up with a list of features I wanted in my new one.

1) Sitting Upright:  Since I'm not trying to be Lance Armstrong, I don't need to minimize my forward profile (if that phrase makes any sense).  I want to be able to look behind me without going through weird contortions.

2) Cargo Capacity:  On my old one I added a rack with collapsible baskets, which served my needs most of the time.  Unfortunately they were inadequate for large items.  This time I opted for a gigantic basket (big enough for a 10 ream paper box) in the rear.  I wish it were detachable so I could use it as a shopping basket in the grocery store, alleviating the need for bags.

3) A Reasonable Number of Gears:  I never took the front derailleur off the middle gear on my last bike so I figured that a 7 speeder would be enough for me.

4) A Two Prong Kickstand:  Loading up the old one was a real hassle.  It just wouldn't stay up when I put anything in the baskets or was trying to bungee something to the rack.  The two pronger keeps it standing upright and centred, making loading up much easier.

5) A Woman's Frame:  Since the reasons it is called a woman's frame no longer apply some are now calling it a "step through frame".  For whatever reasons the difference in frames started, it is no longer reasonable to have the two designs for get around town bikers.  The "step through" frame is good for everybody.  Women can bike in skirts and men don't have worry about rupturing themselves on the bar should they fall of the seat or wiggling their nuts around it at lights.  Secondly it is impossible to mount a "men's" framed bike when there is mass cargo in the back.

A) Fenders:  I don't live in a really rainy climate so I didn't care one way or another about them.  Those that live where they have weather might.

I bought one and modified it to meet these criteria and am very happy with it for the most part.  I did neglect to consider the brakes.  For some reason bike makers seem to think that city bikes don't need brakes to be as good as they do for mountain bikes.  I would argue that they need to be as good or better than mountain bikes.  The mountains don't have cars trying to kill you or pedestrians in ear buds jumping into the street.

I also didn't consider bells.  I occasionally do ride on the sidewalk.  Usually it is only to when it is the only way to get from the street to where I'm going to park it, or the reverse.  Fortunately the bike I bought had one, but I plan to get rid of it in favor of a few jingle bells on a bit of string, or maybe, a card in the spokes.

---

After reviewing this before posting and experiencing a couple of flats, some things have changed.

The bike should have some kind of glove compartment type box.  It just needs to be big enough to hold a patch kit and the required tools, and be secure enough to deter a snatch and grab type thief.

I've changed my mind about fenders.  I'm agin'em.  They made repairing a flat, even in my own driveway, much more difficult than it needed to be. 

Fuckin' Ikea.

First let's talk about their layout.  It is designed to make you walk past everything they have.  They claim that there are shortcuts but they are not readily apparent or signed well.  This is fucking deliberate and evil.  If there is ever a fire, lots of people are going to die and it will be their fault.

When the zombie apocalypse happens Ikea stores will be a good tool for dealing with them.  Once they're inside they will never find their way out.

I only went there for a replacement transformer for a lamp I had because they made it unfixable.  Opening it was difficult enough. the plastic case was sealed with a solvent.  What really sucks is that half the components were under a black blob, so that even if I bothered to figure out which one was at fault, I wouldn't be able to replace it.

Of course I couldn't just buy a new transformer.  That would hurt lamp sales.  Being impatient I decided to just be a sucker and buy the lamp.  Of course they don't have a lamp section in the showroom, so I had to work out what type of room they expected that type of lamp to be used in before I could buy one.

I finally found it.  It works but probably won't last long.

What happened to the middle market, something between Ikea and Herman Miller?  Whenever I want something of good quality without a bunch of bullshit prestige branding I have to scour the thrift stores and garage sales for something from the '60's or earlier.

Some things I've learned from moving.

1) Get rid of your crap. - I've lived in the same place for 20+ years.  The amount of crap you can accumulate in that period is unbelievable.

2) Know where your stuff is. - I've managed to acquire multiple instances things no one will ever need more than one of; 3 offset screwdrivers, 4 sets of jeweler's files, 2 popcorn popers and I don't know how many nut drivers of various sizes.  I wound up in this situation by needing an item and not knowing where it was and simply buying a new one.

3)Live out of boxes. - Rounding up the boxes and putting my shit in them has been one of the more difficult parts of this move.

I don't know how this is going to turn out financially, selling my crap versus the expense of having it hauled may end up costing me money or leaving some extra in my pocket.  I guess I'll find out.

American Money.

I'm not going to talk about the shortcomings of fiat money, U.S. monetary policy or why Keynes was an assbag.  Plenty of others have done that far better than I could.

I am going to go on about the design flaws in physical U.S. currency.  This will all be old news to any foreigner who has traveled here, so you guys might as well just read an older post.

As any foreigner traveling in the U.S. can tell you, our money is confusing.  The notes are all the same color and size and the physical dimensions and apparent materials of the coins tell you nothing of their value.  The reasons for this all make sense historically but who wants to learn the history of a foreign countries money when traveling.  We just want to pay for our stuff and get on.

Let's take a look at the coins arranged by size.

This is not the correct denominational order.  So, lets show the color.  The world has a history of the values of metals being copper<silver< gold, so lots of countries use alloys resembling those metals to denote their coins.

 

But not the U.S.  The above is still not correct. 

Now let's look at them in the correct order.

We have .01, .05, .1, .25, .5 and 1.  They are labeled, stupidly, in prose, and sometimes in terms only an American or maybe, a Canadian would understand, for a couple of them. "one cent", "five cents", "fifty cents" and "one dollar" are as bad as it gets.  But, some time in the past some jackass at the bureaucracy of money designing decided to use colloquial terms on the coins.  No one should expect a foreigner to understand "one dime" and "quarter dollar".

Now to the notes.  In most of the world the notes are different colors and sizes.  Most tourist have stated that they prefer it this way.  I agree with them about the color, but I still prefer a uniform size, to make it easier to arrange things in my wallet.

You don't need multiple sizes to accommodate the blind.  You can just clip corners.

$100, Two diagonal corners clipped.
$50, two corners adjacent on the long side clipped.
$20 two corners adjacent on the short size clipped.
$10 three corners clipped.
$5 all corners clipped.
$1 stop making them and go to a coin like every dollar denominated country in the world.

This even leaves room for them to inflate and reissue $500 and $1,000 notes again.

What really sucks is that they have recently redesigned the currency and didn't fix any of these problem.  Whoever made those decisions deserves to get eaten by zombies.